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” Leila’s thoughts had been racing, had she done everything to cover her tracks? She mentally traced all her steps and could think of nothing, but Joel had put his face in her mistake. She didn’t wash her hair because she didn’t have enough time to dry it. “God,” she thought, “I probably have blades of grass caught in my hair.” “Really?” she answered. “Oh, I tripped in the back yard earlier this evening,” she said, making up the first excuse that came to mind. “Why did you trip,” Joel asked. “I, uh, I was picking up toys the kids had left out and I just lost my balance and took a roll in the grass,” she said. “Hmm,” Joel said. Then he smiled, “Want to take a roll with me?” “Now?” Leila asked. “Yes now,” Joel insisted. “You’ve had a hard day,” she said. “Get some rest.” “The shower refreshed me,” he said. “It didn’t refresh you that much. You need rest. We’re both tired,” she said. Leila was anxious to get him to sleep. She didn’t want him to examine her too closely. She may have. I gagged, you see, because I was still clueless. ‘What the fuck is that smell?’ I barked. ‘Are we on fire? Did you shit your shorts?’ Ainley looked away, but I could see he was trying not to laugh. ‘Welcome,’ he said, ‘to Sheep Shit Airways.’ I rolled my eyes, once they stopped watering, that is. It’s about 6000 miles from Perth to central Saudi Arabia, so depending on winds anywhere from ten to fourteen hours. That’s ten-to-fourteen hours with a bandana tied over your mouth and nose, a couple of spritzes of cologne on the bandana helps — for a while, anyway. I say helps advisedly because nothing, and I mean nothing, completely gets rid of the stench let off thousands of rounds of sheep shit. Even after you crawl on your hands and knees out of the cockpit (gagging, gasping for air) — the stench remains — but by that point it’s in your clothing, your hair, and it never leaves your mind. A crew comes in after the furry little shit-bags are hauled off and, wearing gas masks, they.
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